The Walking Dead Season 7: Batter Up

The Walking Dead Season 7: Batter Up

The Walking Dead returns tonight just in time to distract us all from our miserable lives and the madness of this political season. In an attempt to heal the wounds endured from last season’s fuckery, this piece will serve as a write up of where we ended and where we might go in season seven.


One of the main themes of this show that continues to be a driving force for many of it’s core characters has been the adapt or die approach to survival. We’ve seen what happens to characters who refuse to embrace this change of philosophy for the greater good (Andrea, Tyrese, etc) and we’ve seen others who seemingly have adopted this way of living (Carol) continue to struggle with the loss of whatever humanity they have left. It’s a very interesting dynamic for a show that, at least initially, was very focused on moving forward, no matter what that meant. My main problem with the series is that we’ve seen a lot of the same shit happening but with minor differences. For the most part, the show is essentially about finding a community, building on that community and then moving on when shit hits the proverbial fan. It’s happened at least two times now: with the farm, the prison and Alexandria likely being added to that list. Honestly, it would be fucking great if they could just, you know, stop doing that shit every season; yet I still watch this shit religiously. But we’ve all seen how good this show can be, therefore we all should get very triggered when they do lazy ass shit like recycle plot-lines.

Honestly, it would be fucking great if they could just, you know, stop doing that shit every season.

If I’m wrong and Alexandria ends up becoming the symbol of the New World that Rick and co. hoped it would, then this could take the show in more interesting places. The only problem is that Alexandria is bland as fuck and that’s mainly because the show has an endless supply of red shirts that none of us care about. At the very least, these characters should spark some kind of emotion in us when we see them brutally murdered. I guess that’s asking too much but I hope with the introduction of Negan and his group, that conflict will bring out some unlikely heroes in Alexandria.

In regards to tonight’s episode and who may be on the receiving end of Negan’s bat – I’m not worried. My favorite character is Carol and she isn’t one of the possible victims. She’s off living in another storyline with Morgan. As for the rest of the survivors? They can all die if you ask me. They were the ones who took this shit overboard by killing people in their slumber like degenerates. However, it’s likely to be Glenn or Abraham for two reasons: Glenn’s fate in the source material and Abraham is likable enough to make some of us sad, but expendable enough to make us relieved it was no one else. It seems that the safest route would be to kill off Eugene and his stupid fucking hair.  He’s  proven to be useful in some ways but honestly I would prefer if he exited the show as soon as possible. The only problem with Eugene dying is that it would be extremely anti-climatic after a six month wait. We simply don’t care about him enough to be surprised if he’s the victim. And as it stands, his only real use for the group is that he knows how to create bullets (like, what the fuck?), which he provided instructions to Rick on how to do. It’s likely that this will be one of the key factors in brokering a peace treaty of sorts with Negan and the Saviors. If Rick and his group can provide bullets, that makes them an asset to Negan and his community, and when you’re an asset you’re less likely to get your shit pushed in with a bat.

Disclaimer: But I’ll be fucking livid if this shit turns into another 2-season arc like with the Governor. No one has time for that shit.